What Marcus Aurelius Can Teach You About Your Anxiety
Let me ask you a question. When you feel that familiar, tight knot of anxiety in your chest. When the worries about a work deadline, a social obligation, or the state of the world start to spin in your mind. What is your first instinct?
For many of us in the 21st century, it is to reach for our phones. We scroll through social media, seeking distraction. How about a search for a quick-fix article or a motivational quote on a sun-drenched background? We look for answers in the new, the novel, the next big thing.
But what if the most powerful, practical, and enduring advice is not found in the latest app or bestseller list? What if it has been waiting for you, quietly, on a library shelf for nearly two thousand years?
Today, we are taking a trip in a self-help time machine. We are going to journey back to the battlefields of the Roman Empire. To the tent of Marcus Aurlius man who was arguably the most powerful person in the world. We are going to uncover a profound truth. One that the ancients had a handle on long before we gave them names.
Our guide is the Roman Emperor, and stoic, Marcus Aurelius, and his private journal, known to us as “Meditations”. This was not written for publication. It was a personal exercise. A series of reminders to himself on how to live a good life amidst war, plague, betrayal, and immense stress. It is, in essence, the original self-help book.
So, let us dust off this ancient text and discover how it can help us with a very modern affliction.
The Emperor and the Anxious Mind
Before we dive in, it helps to understand the man. Marcus Aurelius was not a philosopher in an ivory tower. He was the emperor of Rome, a military commander, a father who buried many of his children. He was a leader who ruled during a devastating plague. His life was a maelstrom of pressure, responsibility, and personal grief.
His anxiety was not a theoretical concept; it was the daily fabric of his existence. Sounds familiar, doesn’t it? While our battles are different, the underlying human experience. The feeling of being overwhelmed by forces beyond our control is a constant across the centuries.
This is where his philosophy, Stoicism, becomes our most valuable tool. And do not let the word “Stoic” fool you. This is not about being emotionless or repressing how you feel. It is about developing a robust inner citadel of clarity. So that when the storms of life hit, you do not crumble.
Lesson 1: The Dichotomy of Control, Taming the Helplessness
This is the cornerstone of Stoic practice, and it is the first and most powerful tool we can borrow. Marcus Aurelius constantly reminded himself to distinguish between what is within his control and what is not.
He writes in “Meditations”. “You have power over your mind, not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.”
Let’s make this practical for your anxiety today.
The Ancient Wisdom
The world is divided into two categories:
1.What is up to us. Our opinions, our judgments, our desires, our aversions, and, most importantly, our own actions.
2.What is not up to us. Our body, our reputation, our wealth, the actions of others, the past, the future, and the weather.
Your Modern Exercise
The Worry Sort
When you feel that spiral of anxiety beginning, take a moment. Grab a piece of paper and draw a line down the middle.
On the left, write down everything you are worried about. Be specific. “My presentation tomorrow.” “What my boss thinks of me.” “The political news.” “That my friend is angry with me.”
Now, go through each item and move it to the right-hand column if it is not entirely within your control.
Your boss’s opinion? Not your control. (Move it).
The political news? Not your control. (Move it).
Your friend’s feelings? Not your control. (Move it).
Preparing* for your presentation? Your control. (Keep it on the left).
How you deliver the presentation? Your control. (Keep it on the left).
What you will find is that nearly all the fuel for your anxiety gets moved to the right-hand column. That is the realm of things outside your command. The left-hand column, the realm of your own action, becomes much smaller, more manageable, and far less frightening. Your job is now clear: focus all your energy only on the left-hand column. Release the rest. This is not passive; it is an active, disciplined choice that frees up immense mental energy.
Lesson 2: Present Moment Awareness. Silencing the Inner Noise
We spend most of our lives mentally time-traveling, regretting the past or fearing the future. Our anxiety almost exclusively lives in these two places. Marcus Aurelius had a powerful antidote for this, too.
He reminds himself; “Don’t let your imagination be crushed by life as a whole… Stick with the situation at hand.”
And another; “Confine yourself to the present.”
The Ancient Wisdom
The only moment you truly possess, the only moment you can actually live in, is the present one. The past is a memory; the future is a speculation. By anchoring yourself in the “now,” you pull the plug on the power source of anxiety.
Your Modern Exercise.
The Sensory Anchor
When you find yourself lost in a future worry or a past regret, practice this simple grounding technique. It brings you back to the reality of the present, which is very often perfectly safe and manageable.
Pause whatever you are doing.
Take one slow, deep breath.
Now, say to yourself, silently,
Five things you can see. (For example, the grain of the wood on your desk, the colour of a pen, the light from the window).
Four things you can feel. (For example, the fabric of your shirt, the floor beneath your feet, the cool air on your skin).
Three things you can hear. (The hum of your computer, distant traffic, your own breath).
Two things you can smell. (Your coffee, the air in the room).
One thing you can taste. (The last sip of water, the lingering taste of your meal).
This is not just mindfulness; it is a practical application of a Stoic principle. It forces your mind out of the abstract, fearful world of “what if” and into the concrete, real world of “what is.” And in the “what is,” you are usually okay.
Lesson 3: The Art of Re-framing. Changing Your Perspective on Obstacles
We often see obstacles. A canceled flight, a critical comment, a sudden problem, as purely negative events that ruin our plans. Marcus Aurelius offers a radical shift in perspective.
Famously he said;
“The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.”
This is the famous Stoic principle of turning obstacles into fuel.
The Ancient Wisdom.
A challenge is not just a barrier; it is an opportunity. An opportunity to practice patience, to develop creativity, to demonstrate courage, or to learn humility. The obstacle itself is the training ground for the virtue you need to cultivate.
Your Modern Exercise
The “And That’s Good Because…” Game.
When you encounter a frustration or setback, big or small, try this mental game. Force yourself to complete this sentence: “This is happening… and that’s good because…”
“I’m stuck in traffic… and that’s good because… it gives me a few extra minutes to listen to my favourite podcast or sit in silence.”
“My project was criticised… and that’s good because… it reveals a blind spot I can now fix, making the final result stronger.”
“I have to have a difficult conversation… and that’s good because… it is a chance for me to practice courage and clear communication.”
This is not about naive positivity. It is about proactive resilience. It is about taking back the narrative and asserting that you have the power to define what an event means for you.
Your Invitation to the Past
The beauty of this “self-help time machine” is that it’s always available. The wisdom of Marcus Aurelius, Seneca, Epictetus, and countless other Stoic thinkers is not locked away. It’s there for you, in the public domain, free for the taking.
You do not need to read “Meditations” cover-to-cover in one sitting. Keep it on your bedside table. Read a passage or two each morning. Let the ideas simmer in your mind throughout the day.
The next time that knot of anxiety begins to form, remember the emperor in his tent. Remember that you have a choice. You can choose to focus only on what is yours to control. You can choose to anchor yourself in the safety of the present moment. You can choose to see the obstacle not as a barrier, but as the path itself.
The most powerful self-help wasn’t invented yesterday. It was merely rediscovered.
Yours in timeless wisdom,
Pete
N.B.